Monday, March 21, 2011

story of one personal letter

I've got 10 theories. Pick one or more that suit you and the reality the most.

1. you're an ass, that's it. a big fat ass and nothing more
2. you hate me and try all the small stupid tricks just to let me know about it
3. I'm just a dumb little thing making a big story out of that just one unreplied email, one stupid Sunday evening, one clearly harmless "missing in action" thing from that day in the cafe and a stupid chat message on the stupid March 8 day and I've annoyed the hell out of you already!
4. you're awfully too busy to drop me a line that you are, in fact, busy, and we may reschedule the things we needed to discuss for next month/year
5. you heard somewhere that i bite and kick asses of men and decided that you better ignore me than be beaten up by some geek chick
6. you feel that you've been an ass not to notify me that you are busy when you were supposed to, then you had a sorta guilt feeling and decided to avoid me and the topic whatsoever until we both remember it when we accidentally meet again in few years
7. you had a strange dream and woke up feeling that I have some hots for you,  and I'll be chasing you all around and decided that you better avoid the whole story in a gentle ignoring way since you're just not into me
8. you know that you were supposed to let me know that you're not coming and you were kinda sorta very busy these couple of weeks and were actually going to write me.. just now! but I was quicker..
9. you feel oppressed and miserable when talking to me since I'm so much informed in some things that it makes you feel like a loser. and unless i dye my hair blonde and erase half of my brain's hard drive, I will you make feel like some douchebag everytime you communicate with me
10. you are reading this thinking WTF! since you've sent me several text messages, called few times, wrote on FB, commented on my foursquare checkins and got not response. must be that it's me ignoring you.

Action Items

  • if you feel that theories #1, #2 are more like you, then you should probably just ignore this message as well and we'll both live happily ever after and hopefully never see each other again.
  • if you feel that #5, #9 are closer to the truth then you have some clear problems with confidence and your feminine hormones are just overwhelming you right now and I better leave you alone dealing with this, not to make it worse. just forget, ok?
  • you're convinced that #3 is the case and oh, I'm a drama queen ya know.. I think I need some assistance here.. any chance you know a good shrink? [let's rule PMS out, not the case :)]
  • If #4 and #6 are close to reality, then it's better that we really flush all this story out to the toilet and go back to the day when you added me on foursquare or I friended you on FB and leave it as it was before. no reply needed to this obviously stupid message.
  • #7 Here I'd only say - "Duuuude, you're so not my type.. so calm down, it's just business and maybe I was that stupid to suppose that we could somehow be friends", well sorry to disappoint you then. I'd recommend you reading the following 'cry of my heart'.
  • if you feel that theories #8 and #10 are more like you, then you can come and talk to me this Sunday, 2pm at *****. no need to write a reply or anything.  

    **If you feel that I've gotten too far writing this smartass message and forgot to mention THE OBVIOUS, which shows you completely guilt-free and me (and my imagination) the sole reason for everything, then again you should probably come join me on Sunday and make me blush and cry and beg your pardon on my knees.

    What was this?
    my friend got an Android phone and is slowly becoming a geek. there has been some social media miscommunication between us since then. of course social networks made it easier to reconnect, however between all the Likes, Comments, Check-ins, comments on Check-ins, text messages, chat conversations, etcetera we kind of lost contact and it was actually harder to keep in touch :-D

    at some point I got confused, as I didn't hear from him for a while. Since i had no clue what was happening with him and I was worried, i decided to let him know about it and at least get his attention :)
    * I'm publishing the letter with some modification and with his permission :)

    So, if you were him, would you go? :)


    Mira said...


    Lord Archimonde said...

    Arpik jan ... chishtn asac lav chhaskaca inch a katarvum (hamarya) :) bajc 2 ban kuzenai asel ...
    1. es mi ban gitem/haskacel em ... ete inch vor ban a petq petq a gnal gtnel u _vercnel_, qani vor erbeq voch voq da qez chi ta ... ete hetaqrqrum a inch vor meky ... apa petq a zangel xisel ira het kam gnal u iran handipel... qani vor hakarak depqum es karqi mtqer en arajanum u erb vor haskanum es vor es ameny karox er chlinel ete uxaki qajl anir... mi tesak Abidno ... :) mi guce es iroq chem haskacel gract... u hima temai mej chem ... sorry for that...
    2. es indz kdasei erevo bolor 10 depqerin el tarber mardkanc het... ev tarber zhamanakner... :) bajc amen depqum kuzenai gal Sunday, 2pm at **** qez het mi qich shpvelu... :)